Comedy Course · Expats · V1 · Developing material. Lightly edited for readability and delivery; the original dictated version remains preserved in the workshop.
I don’t know if you guys have heard of that term, expats. I assume this crowd has. And I don’t give a shit about— I just want to make sure you guys understand.
An expat, for those who don’t know, is somebody who’s a foreigner wherever they are, but they’re there sort of for work, right? For a limited period of time. They’re not integrating. They’re not vacationing. They’re not tourists. But they’re visiting a foreign country.
I had the opportunity to be an expat of the United States, sort of, right? When I worked in the Philippines for many years, and even when I met my wife in Mexico. And I’m Brazilian by birth. I have a different relationship with, you know—think Brazil, Rio, ladies and stuff. Maybe we are, I would say, a little bit more sexual by nature, and a little bit freer in expressing ourselves.
But now think of a Midwestern American guy, 22, 23 years old. That guy gets pulled up by a telecom company and they say, “Hey, you guys are gonna have to train all these Filipinos on how to, you know, deny minutes to your phone,” right? Because that was way back when you paid per minute. Not everything was unlimited. See how old I am?
But anyways, imagine that 20-year-old who’s been in the United States, can’t drink yet or whatever. Gets to the Philippines. He can not only drink, he can go to strip clubs, he can go to whorehouses, he can do anything.
That is the type of man that you should be afraid of.
And a local Filipino, a local Brazilian, a local Mexican—she’s afraid of those guys.
So when you guys have your little panic, you know, that there are these immigrants that come here to work and they act a certain way, we ain’t that much different.
The things that my coworkers did when they got to these places, it’s as if there are no laws and there are no rules.
So don’t forget before you go judging. Because at some point, the way things are, you might be trying to become these nomads elsewhere.
And let me tell you, half of y’all don’t know how to behave.